Blue skirt, rainbow socks

Gender 101

The public conversation around gender has become increasingly nuanced since my college days, much to my delight. That said, the influx of new language can be overwhelming. If you want to know why someone called you “cis” or are just looking for a crash course in gender, this post is for you. Vocabulary sex: Refers to the anatomy of an individual’s reproductive system, and secondary … Continue reading Gender 101

Me as a "man at a glance"

Man at a Glance

“My masculinity doesn’t hold up to scrutiny,” says Hannah Gadsby during her stand-up special Nanette, “I’m only a man at a glance.” I remember laughing particularly hard at this point, because I can relate more than most. I’ve talked about why I often get mistaken for a man (in short, I lack your trademark feminine curves and stature and have short hair) before, but I … Continue reading Man at a Glance

My friend and I getting down with our queer selves, circa 2009.

Visibly Queer

Recently, I was reading Jill Soloway (the creator of Transparent)’s book, “She Wants It” and came to a passage where Jill talks about hitting puberty and suddenly having a very feminine body and the ability to wield sexual power over men (at least in theory). The part that confused me was the tone, implying that this transformation is a universal experience for those of us assigned female … Continue reading Visibly Queer

A goofy self-portrait from 2011

Progress

If you played an instrument for any length of time while you were growing up in the United States, you were probably subjected to an adjudicated music festival at some point in time. Since I grew up in New York, ours was called “NYSSMA,” which referred to the organization that ran it, the New York State School Music Association. My mom once called it “lambs … Continue reading Progress